Abbott Elementary
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCAbbott Elementary Season 2 Quotes
This is gonna be the best show in Philly since Dru Hill sold out the Wachovia Center in '03. They were like two hours late, but Sisqo did like thirty backflips
Ava
Janine: Why can't you ever give me credit for a good idea?
Ava: Stop making everything about you, Janine. AVA FEST is about the kids!
Janine: So what, we throw a big festival during Open House and make people sign the petition to get in?
Ava: Now that's absurd. But it does give me an idea. We should throw a big FUN festival during Open House and make everyone sign the petition to get in!
Allie: We could bribe the superintendent!
Melissa: With what money? Would you get your head in the game, Allie!
Mr. Johnson: In my safety deposit box, I have three-fourths of what I think is a treasure map, now if we find the other quarter --
Janine: What if we just focus on new ideas because what we've been doing isn't working?
Ava: No idea is too stupid to pitch.
Allie: How about we just lock all the doors in the school? Then they can't get in. Like Lean on Me?
Ava: In a rare turn of events, I was wrong. Please only pitch good ideas.
Melissa: I mean, teaching kindergarten the most important, Barb? All you'se do is teach kindergarteners how to use safety scissors.
Barbara: And maybe if your kindergarten teacher had done a better job, you would know "you'se" is not plural for you.
Jacob: Teacher's Appreciation Week was actually created so less teachers would quit.
Mr. Johnson: That's why Mother's Day was invented, so less mothers would leave their families
Jacob: What about a good old fashioned --
Melissa: -- Bareknuckled fist fight?
Jacob: I was gonna say vote.
Alright, looks like all the votes are in. And somehow, nobody got Molly-Whopped.
Ava
Janine: It's gonna be fun! And it's BYOBG!
Gregory: Bring your own Beer goggles?
Jacob: Bubble gum?
Gregory: Baby giraffe?
Jacob: Big Gulp?
Gregory: Britney Griner?
Jacob: Black Gregory?
Janine: What? No! Bring your own board game. Real simple.
Ayesha: People had hope for you and they gave up on me. Yeah, you had it together. And I couldn't get it together when Mom -- the one who needed me the most was the most disappointed in me. So fine then, I couldn't take it, I couldn't handle it, so I ran. I left. Janine, I'm sorry.
Janine: I get why you left mom, I do, just kinda felt like you left me too.
Melissa: So, um, who you thinking about taking with you to the game?
Mr. Johnson: I'm bringing Dr. J.
Gregory: You know Julius Irving?
Mr. Johnson: No, Dr. Jamar Cameron, my podiatrist.
