Monica Geller Quotes
Monica: Joey, you know, maybe you're just not used to kissing men. Maybe you just tensed up a little bit. Maybe that's what you need to work on.
Joey: Yeah, that makes sense.
(Joey looks over at Ross)
Ross: Over my dead body.
(Joey looks over at Chandler)
Chandler: And I'll be using his dead body as a shield.
Monica: I read an article the other day that said you're not supposed to throw rice at weddings, because when pigeons eat it, it kills them.
Richard: So that's why you never see pigeons in sushi bars.
Monica: My boyfriend doesn't have a thing!
Richard: See, if anyone overheard that, I didn't come off well.
(to Phoebe) Ryan's been underwater. He's just going to be glad you don't have barnacles on your butt.
Monica: Honey, you made the bed again. I told you, you don't have to do that. This isn't camp.
Richard: Then I guess the panty raid last night was completely out of line.
Monica: Joey, they're not real! I start miles beneath the surface of these things, okay? They're fake. See (Monica squeezes her breast) Honk honk.
Chandler: Wow, it's, it's like porno for clowns.
Rachel: But Monica, you don't know the first thing about the stock market.
Monica: What's to know? Buy, low, sell, high, bears, bulls! (Picks up the phone) Yes, Manhattan. Telephone number for the stock... selling store.
Joey: Monica. Relax. Go get a beer.
Monica: I don't want a beer!
Joey: Who said it was for you?
Joey: Hey Monica, why are we watching the business channel?
Monica: 'Cause I was going by it the other day and I saw that there was a stock with my initials, MEG, on it and, well, sometimes I have to watch for two or three hours before it comes up again but when it does, it's pretty exciting.
Rachel: Okay honey, you really need a job.
Rachel: What happened to, uh, MEG?
Monica: MEG was good for me, but I dumped her. Ya know, my motto is "get out before they go down."
Joey: That is so not my motto!
Monica: (On the phone) Time is money, my friend! Whoo!
Rachel: "Time is money, my friend?"
Joey: Yeah, you missed, "Takes money to make money," and, "Don't make me come down there and kick your Wall Street butt."
Monica: Hey, I made $17 before breakfast. What have you done?
Joey: Well, I had breakfast here, so technically I just saved $3.50.
Monica: So are you okay?
Richard: Yeah, just, I feel like I'm about a hundred. I thought I was just one of the guys.
Monica: Come here. I'll make you feel like one of the guys. You know for a really cool guy, you suck at foosball!
