Rainier: My son returns from a fancy east coast college and I'm horrified to find he's a nerd.
Kent: Haha, I'm laughing already.
Rainier: It's not a comedy.

Here's your taco mister. Oops, I dropped it in the fryer. I'll get it out. Ow. Oooow! Ooow! Oow!

Squeeky-Voiced Teen

Bette Midler: Great show Krusty! You deserve an Emmy for this!
Krusty: Forget it. The academy hates me...I don't know why...they wouldn't know comedy if it bit them on their (notices the camera) Hey! Hey!

Krusty: I've had plenty of guys come after me and I've buried them all. Hobos, sea captains, Joey Bishop
Krusty's Assistant: Don't forget the Special Olympics.
Krusty: Oh, yeah. I buried the Special Olympics!

Bette Midler: Did you ever know that you're my hero? You're everything I would like to be.
Krusty: You can fly higher than an eagle.
Bette/Krusty: Cause you/I are/am the wind beneath my/your wings.

Give me a bigger lolly!

Krusty

Bart: Moe, look over there! (as a distraction)
Moe: What? What am I looking at? I don't see nothing. I'm gonna stop looking soon What? What, is that it?
Homer walks into Moe's Tavern
Homer: Hey Moe, can I look, too?
Moe: Sure, but it'll cost ya.
Homer: My wallet's in the car.
Homer runs out
Moe: He is so stupid. And now back to the wall.

I'll admit I used the city treasury to fund the murder of my enemies, but as Gabbo would say, I'm a bad wittle boy.

Mayor Quimby

Krusty: Bette and I owned a race horse together: Krudler.

  • Permalink: Krudler.
  • Added:

Krusty: Ugh, 35 years in show business and already no one remembers me, just like what's-his-name and whose-it, and you know that guy, always wore a shirt?
Bart: Ed Sullivan?

Don't snap my undies.

Chief Wiggum

Gabbo: (prank calls Krusty the Clown)
Krusty: If this is anyone other than Steve Allen, you're stealing my bit!

The Simpsons Season 4 Quotes

Maggie? Oh, you must be sick. Let's see, what's old Dr. Washburn prescibe? Do you have dropsy? The grippe? Scofula? The vapors? Jungle rot? Dandy fever? Poor man's gout? Housemaid's knee? Climatic poopow? The staggers? Dum-dum fever?

</i> Abe

(To Homer) Now if you'll excuse me, I have to appear on a tortilla in Mexico.

God