The Office Season 3 Episode 7: "The Merger" Quotes
Sometimes what brings the kids together is hating the lunch lady. Although that'll change. Because, by the end of the fourth grade, the lunch lady was actually the person I hung out with the most.
Michael
Last weekend, I outran a black pepper snake.
Dwight
Kelly: Jim!!! Oh my god, I have so much to tell you. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had a baby, and they named it Suri! And Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie also had a baby, and they named is Shiloh! And both babies are amaziiiing!
Jim: Wow, so, uh, what's new with you?
Kelly: I just told you.
Karen: Does Bob Vance work for Vance Refrigeration?
Jim: Does he ever.
This is an orientation, not a bore-ientation.
Michael
Phyllis: Bob Vance bought this perfume for me in Metropolitan Orlando. It's made from real pine.
Karen: Who's Bob Vance?
Phyllis: You have a lot to learn about this town, sweetie.
Dwight: Hello. I don't believe we've been introduced. Dwight Schrute, Assistant Regional Manager.
Andy: Andy Bernard, Regional Director in charge of Sales.
Dwight: So you'll be reporting to me then.
Andy: On the contrary.
Dwight: My title has "manager" in it.
Andy: And I'm a director. Which on a film set is the highest title there is. Do you know anything about film?
Dwight: I know everything about film. I've seen over 240 of them.
Andy: Congratulations.
You know who I really like? Is this guy Andy Bernard. He has got this very likeable way about him.
Michael
Andy: Hello.
Michael: Ah, you must be Andy Bernard. Aloha and welcome!
Andy: And you must be Michael Scott. Aloha and hel-lo!
I'll be the number-two guy here in Scranton in six weeks. How? Name repetition, personality mirroring, and never breaking off a handshake. I'm always thinking one step ahead. Like a... carpenter... that makes stairs.
Andy
The Japanese camp guards of World War II always chose one man to kill whenever a batch of new prisoners arrived. I always wondered how they chose the man who was to die. I think I would have been good at choosing the person.
Dwight
My branch is absorbing the Stamford branch. Or as I like to put it, my family is doubling in size.
Michael