Scrubs Season 4 Episode 17: "My Life in Four Cameras" Quotes
J.D.: Besides, I defy you to find one other thing that I'm afraid of!
Janitor: Mopping time! Mopping time! It's mopping time!
(The audience whoops and cheers)
Janitor: Yes, it's mopping time, my friend! And as you know, I always like to start in the exact spot you're standing. Let's get to work.
Dr. Cox: Hold your horses. Just tell me who the last person hired was, would you please?
Kenny: Looks like you folks could use a little refresher! Serving people like you who save lives every day, makes me happier than a kitten chasing a leaky cow! God bless ya! God bless ya.
Dr. Cox: I have to fire Opie, don't I?
Jordan: You think?
Dr. Kelso: What do you want, Perry?
Dr. Cox: Bob, enough of the stinking budget cuts, already!
Dr. Kelso: Noted. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to fire someone.
Dr. Cox: Oh, baloney, old man!
Turk: My wife's name's Carla.
J.D.: Yeah!
Turk: Yeah! Like Carla from the show.
J.D.: Just like it.
Mr. James: Wow...I've never actually met anyone who had the same name as a character on the show.
J.D./Turk: Really?
Mr. James: No.
J.D.: Oh, well, that's understandable...
Turk: Yeah.
J.D.: I mean, there's a lot of Sams...
Turk: There's probably a lot of Carlas...
J.D.: Okay, then, Mr. James, you're free- Wait a second, Charles James? I was watching the "Cheers" DVD the other night - are you Charles James the writer?
Mr. James: Yeah, that's me.
J.D.'s narration: Just. Stay. Calm.
J.D.: Uh, Elliot, I need to take this gentleman upstairs for some more, uh, tests.
Elliot: J.D., don't leave me here.
J.D.: This is very important! He may even need a surgical consult.
J.D.: Ahh. Kylie's in class all day and she bartends at night, and I'm still working sixteen-hour shifts, so we try to make sure we kiss at least once a day. Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, she takes a cab over here; Tuesdays and Thursdays, I scooter to my baby!
Turk: Honey. I haven't foofied in bed in like a week!
Dr. Cox: Hey, Kenny, once again I'm...I'm real sorry.
Dr. Kelso: Welcome to my world. Now, imagine going home to my wife.
Elliot: Wait a second! This chart isn't for Charles James, it's for James Charles! He's the one who has cancer, not you!
J.D.: And who cares about him! He's anti-Semitic!
Carla: Uh, Turk and I are gonna go home and spend some time together. Some GOOD TIME!
Turk: And by "good time" she means bumping uglies!
Hey, I'm wondering, what's the story with steel wool? I mean, is it steel or is it wool? Make up your mind, steel wool. Are there iron sheep hopping around in Scotland?
Janitor
Carla: Are you humming the "let's all go to the movies" song?
Turk: Is that not our song?
Carla: It's sung by hot dogs!
Dr. Cox: Let's take a look at our other options. Gandhi? You appear to be a man that is utterly without talent. Unless, of course, you wanna count the fact that you are the twentieth-best basketball player in a predominately white hospital? Jordan, your only skill is illegal in twenty-six states.
Jordan: It's twenty-seven. Arkansas buckled.
Dr. Cox: Carla, that makes you my girl. Hell, we could crank up the humidity and watch your hair explode, that'd be terrific.
