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Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCModern Family Season 2 Episode 13: "Caught in the Act" Quotes
It's like your shaking hands, but you're not using your hands. At all.
Phil [on sex]
They called a family meeting when they switched to one percent milk.
Haley
We are beyond blotting and rubbing, we've moved on to sweating and crying.
Cam
Claire: We need a game plan, we need to map out exactly what we are going to say, because that is the only way I will be able to hold it together while our babies look at us with judgment and disgust.
Phil: That's how they always look at us.
I know what sex is, it's when a man and a woman take off their underwear and get into bed.
Luke
It sended! Please come back!
Gloria
Whatever they were doing, Dad was winning.
Luke [on seeing his parents having sex]
If this were the '60s, we would be 'confirmed bachelors,' and Lily would be a Yorkie.
Cam
Claire, we're not your parents; we're in much better shape.
Phil
Forgive me for thinking your zesty performance deserves some praise!
Phil
Phil: We were, as they say, having sex.
Claire: That's not a euphemism. That's actually what we were doing.