Friends Season 1 Episode 21: "The One with the Fake Monica" Quotes
Monica: I don't know what I'm going to do without you! Who's going to crash with me the embassy parties? Who is going take me to the Big Apple Circus?
Fake Monica: Monica, I started my day by peeing in front of twenty five women, and you're worried who is going to take you to the Big Apple Circus?!
Monica: Not worried, just wondering.
This is so unfair. She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have my mother.
Ross: She says Marcel's humping thing's not a phase. Apparently, he's reached sexual maturity.
Joey: (To Chandler) Hey! He beat ya!
Phoebe: (To Marcel) Goodbye little monkey guy. I wrote you this poem, okay, but don't eat it until you get on the plane.
Ross: Aw. Thank you, Aunt Phoebe.
Phoebe: Oh!
Chandler: Okay, bye, champ. Now, I know there's gonna be a lot of babes in San Diego, but remember, there's also a lot to learn.
Joey: I don't know what to say, Ross. It's a monkey.
Ross: Well, just say what you feel, Joey.
Joey: Marcel, I'm hungry.
Ross: That was good.
Rachel: (Holding a teddy bear) Marcel, this is for you. It's uh, just, you know, something to, um, do on the plane.
Ross: If you guys don't mind, I would like to take a moment just with just me and him.
Everyone: Of course. Absolutely.
Ross: Marcel, come here. Well buddy, this is it. Just a couple of things that I wanted to say. Well, I'm really gonna miss you. I'm never gonna forget about you. You've been more than just a pet to me. You've been more like a-- Marcel, would you just leave my leg alone? Would you just stop humping me for two seconds?! Would just take him away? Just take him.
Ross: I just got back from the vet.
Chandler: She's not going to make you wear one of those big plastic cones, is she?
Teacher: You can come up to the front and dance with me.
Monica: Why don't I just take off my clothes, and have a nightmare?
Monica: You have got to do something about the humping!
Ross: What? It's just a phase.
Chandler: Well, that's what we said about Joey.
Chandler: Joe... Joe... Joe... Stalin?
Joey: Stalin! Stalin. Do I know that name? It sounds familiar.
Chandler: Well, it does not ring a bell with me!
Joey: Joe Stalin. You know, that's pretty good!
Chandler: Hey, you know, you might wanna try Joseph.
Joey: Joseph Stalin. I think you'd remember that!
Joey: You know there already is a Joseph Stalin?!
Chandler: You're kidding!
Joey: Apparently he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people. You'd think you would've known that!
Chandler: Ya know, you'd think I would have.
